Ten ways to give back to ourselves as parents

10 Ways to give back to ourselves as parents

Let’s talk about us for a moment.

..As parents we are hard on ourselves.

Childhood is such a short period of time we can look back on some aspects and really not remember the joys.

Why is that?

Sometimes it’s because it was just hard work, tiredness and lots of general difficulties all robbing our joy.  We need to nurture ourselves along with our children. Today that’s what we talking about giving back to ourselves as parents.

Don’t extinguish the joy you had before you had children

Life and times have and will always change. Remember who you were, who you are and who you are becoming. Is it what you want?

Share your passions

We wear so many different hats and passions come way down on our list of conversations. Passions are the most exciting. What can you talk about that’s you- pure you that you love or have loved?

Nothing like hearing passion when people talk especially about something so different to parenting. We are more than only parents.

Spend time away regularly

We need it.

They need it.

Make it happen.

Schedule and plan it.

Yes it is hard and perhaps you’ll do a gradual few hours here and half a day there.

Nourish the relationships around you.

Get to know your spouse. Go away together without the children.

The perspective and peace  of time away is something you need.

Network, mix, be with other families from everywhere

Since we move around we have friends all around the world. It’s hard keeping in touch. Many of us are living in new places away from extended family.

If you’re already in established friendship groups reach out to people. We have so many different experiences to share. Get to know all different types of people from different countries, backgrounds and experiences.

Share stories of childhood, favourite things, dreams and pictures long forgotten.

Have you ever had a time when you’ve just told stories and reminisced about your childhood? Favourite things? Maybe you came across a photo album. These memories are strong and some worth sharing.

When did we stop dreaming out loud? sharing what we’d like or love to do and reaching for it?

We need friendships that encourage and support us to follow our passions. Those that help us plan to reach our dreams probably have heard our stories and spent time with us.

They ask us our progress, comfort us and cheer us on.Who did you last spend time with just talking? Who have you checked in on lately about the progress of their big idea?

Never be afraid to ask for help or support

Just choose wisely where to ask and what to do with that information once you have it. We all mean well but ultimately you know what’s best for your family.

Set your own trail and blaze it.

You maybe the different one in your group or do something a little different. Different always stands out. Don’t let your thirst for change dry up. We won’t always get things right but we should try. Focus and perspective is difficult if you’re always comparing. We won’t measure up. We can be better than we were yesterday and plan for tomorrow.

Nourish your relationships outside of your children

We need friends. Good friends. Ones that knew you before you were parents as well as those you have now with children. They can often show you glimpses of people, marriages, parenthood that you want to be and share paths of trouble.

Take time regularly to refocus, regroup and get back on track

This time of year is popular for refocusing,planning and laying out goals for the following year. Truthfully, it can happen at any time of the year. Just make it work for you. Looking back and reflecting on your parenting, play, marriage, work, faith, free time etc and making adjustments gets us back on track quickly. It’s often the small tweaks when we really stop and look at our productivity and set our goals that we make the most of our time.

Be realistic

We can’t do and be everything.

We have to make choices.

Saying yes to something will mean saying no to something else.

It’s pretty easy to throw our hands in the air.

Take a little at a time. One small bite and we can tackle it.

Photo credit

So those were my 10 things I’m giving back to myself . What will you give back to yourself?

 

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