February 6th, 2012 Preparing a place of choice Posted by Melitsa in language, play activities, Thought of the week

During the toddler and preschool years the word, “No!” becomes a very powerful word. It derails the happy atmosphere, stops a quick exit on errands, means we scoop our little one off the floor in that shop and march out. They want an input. They want a choice.

As a parent you can allow for extra time for the No! We get all forceful and insistent. Neither of these work well overtime. Even we as parents need to practise what to do when we get that No. It’s hard to play with a child that insists on having things their way or you having it totally your way. Personal, social and emotional development is a crucial aspect of play. We need to be able to get along and well. This is the first of a two-part series.
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Practice when you are calm and have a script

Think about what you will say when they are shouting and yelling at you. Replay times when you saw this or experienced this and work out what you could do differently and try it out.

Getting down to their level; looking them in the eye and smile. The smile is for you to calm down however brief. Watch how other people  de-escalate their children and try it out.

Identify 2-3 activities at home to regularly give choices

Practise choice activities at home. Choose choices that you are happy with either option. Keep them simple. Children have very few choices so  having the red counter or the blue counter when playing the board game may seem trivial to us but they don’t see it that way.

Choices like; clothes, food, activity, play.

• Scrambled eggs or cereal?
• Blue jeans or green trousers with Bob on the side?
• Pretend food or Dolls?

What’s your number one struggle with your under 5?

February 3rd, 2012 Teaching kids sportsmanship Posted by Melitsa in Education, play activities, Thought of the week

Ever wonder if the play activities you do and the values you teach really stick with your child?
Ever played with a child and been beaten in a simple game?

It happened this week and really illustrated something to me worth sharing. We need to teach our kids sportsmanship intentionally. It can’t be a happy accident or rob them of the chance by artificially bending the rules, too far for them to miss the opportunity of learning.

What happened?

He was thrilled to have won, not just once but three times at dominoes. I didn’t let him win. It’s how the dominoes played out. ( As anyone knows who’s played dominoes with me; I’m no domino player- just matching!) The joy of his win was right there. I said the right things; Good game and congratulated him on the thrashing he gave me.

He gave me a hug and said. Thanks for playing mum. Then wanted to reassure me that we could play three more games so I could win. We then had an interesting discussion about winning and losing and how we both felt. Being able to bring it up again at dinner to the family helped.

Play – Model- Play- Reinforce- Play

What they need

They need to have practise to articulate their feelings and put their thoughts into words, with us. When we play with them we give that opporrtunity. If we let them win all the time they don’t know what to say or do when they lose elsewhere.

The bigger test will be how he responds now in company and away from home

Do you let them win?

January 31st, 2012 31 days to a more Playful Tot {Day Thirty One} Creating a playspace Posted by Melitsa in 31 days, Memes, play activities, Thought of the week

Today we’ve come to the last day of 31 days to a more playful tot. Each day there’s been a chance of thought, growth, action and reflection. While we’re not aiming at making perfect playful children and recognise that we have to do, fail and learn ourselves; I hope we’ve all found some new things to try.

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I’ve always been in awe of beautiful play spaces. However as a military family it has never been practical to create these amazing areas. Also, I feel that most of the world has much smaller spaces to deal with with children. There isn’t always the luxury of a playroom just a play corner. Most people have rooms with multiple functions so need a way to conceal yet have access to both things.

This slideshow does just that…..

Here’s a chance to think about your small area; one chunk at a time. Transform the playspace you have.
Thanks for sharing in the journey of 31 days to a more playful tot.

Enjoy the slideshow.

1. Eco friendly playroom
2. Hand print calendar 
3. A Quiet Place: DIY A-Frame Tent
4. Display 
5. Use garden hanging baskets
6. Creating-waldorf-indoor-playspaces
7. Play stands
8. Displaying board games
9. Photograph art then toss
10. Create A Large Scale Art Center
11. Storage and display
12.  Chilling out areas
13. A magnetic, chalkboard, dry erase,with sliding ladder WALL!
14. Fun pebble cushions 

January 30th, 2012 31 days to a more Playful Tot {Day Thirty} Keep unstructured play flexible Posted by Melitsa in 31 days, Memes, play activities

There is something to be said for children being bored. The problem though is can you direct them or inspire them to engage in longer periods of unstructured play?

It almost seems wrong in many eyes to set up an environment for unstructured play. But for most of us we have our default go to activities, actions and behaviours. It’s all to easy to have high expectations and nothing to fill the gaps. It’s why when we see screen free week or world read aloud day that we love the concept but when that special day or week is here we find it hard to actually do what we wanted. Bit like, don’t think of a pink elephant! It’s hard not too.

Unstructured play, downtime and unplugged play, certainly at the beginning for most of us needs to be planned, discussed and modelled.

Planned

Set aside some time to decide what unstructured play will look for you in your home. How far will you go? Will they be playing independently from you while you read a magazine or will they be creating complex tracks and imaginary stories?

Time

Set realistic time blocks. Start small with age appropriate time blocks. The chance of us to spend a whole afternoon doing what we want is appealing but to a young child it may feel like too much. Depending on your child’s temperament and how often an afternoon of unstructured play may be in your future but it’s not always there at the beginning.

Boundaries

What can they do during this unstructured time? Are resources accessible? Imagination games with restaurants, stuffed animals, train sets and dressing up clothes can take over the whole house. Little planning lets you see where this type of play is best and when.  Can they play with markers, glitter, playdough?

Listen and observe

Before jumping in to their worlds, watch and join in without taking over. It’s possible to build on their stories or activities by asking open-ended questions.

• Tell me about that part of your picture….
• You’ve used a lot of orange there. What’s that part about?

 Talk about unstructured play activities

Start a bucket list or I’m bored jar with older children. It’s amazing what you can think up together when you look at games and activities they can do by themselves or with a sibling. The list gives a neutral point of reference for you and them when you are thinking of hands free activities

Flexible structure

To get the most out of unstructured play we’ve dipped in and out with each other. Concentrated 10-15 minutes of activities before either of us checks in with each other. Sometimes they are around the home involved and sometimes they are alone but in the same room.

There isn’t a one size fits all for unstructured play, either inside or outside.  The way we’ve tried this has changed as the ages and stages change and when new children arrive.

 What are your 3 go to unstructured activities your children seem to love?

Click here to read the rest of the posts in the series, 31 Days to a more Playful Tot.

January 29th, 2012 31 days to a more Playful Tot {Day Twenty Nine} Saying yes Posted by Melitsa in 31 days, Memes, play activities

When you say yes to something you say no to something else.

The power of that statement impacts so many parts of our lives but when we look at our children’s play lives we can quickly see how  saying yes to too many things will have a negative impact.  The power of this statement is in the choice. The choices we make for our children. The choices we make for ourselves and our family.

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It’s a constant struggle or looking for opportunities for everyday playful experiences. It’s looking at where you are and where you want to be and plotting, planning and learning your way into that place.

When you read that statement what came to mind in your home? What do you say yes to regularly and realise that you are now saying no to something else?
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How are you raising a playful tot?

Listen to 7 tips to raising a playful tot.

Click here to read the rest of the posts in the series, 31 Days to a more Playful Tot.